10 Signs You’re Bad at Setting Personal Boundaries

Over ten years ago, I received a book about boundaries. I read it, decided it didn’t apply to me, and passed it on to a friend without hesitation.

Since then, I’ve purchased another copy, read more on the topic, and realized just how much I need this message.

Poor boundaries contributed to a lot of pain in my life. I took on the weight of the world, which was never mine to bear, and it crushed me.

In my limited and simplistic understanding, I thought boundary-less people said yes too many times when asked to serve: when you’re asked to bring meals, teach a class, organize a group, go here, go there, and do all the things. If you can’t say no and limit your activity, you struggle with personal boundaries.

Living with healthy boundaries is so much more than saying no to the next thing someone asks of you.

Personal boundaries have to do with internal structures that belong to you and not other people. Your feelings, thoughts, actions, attitudes, desires, opinions, and beliefs are yours. Each of us has our own. Boundaries help us define what belongs to us, especially the things which impact our heart, mind, and soul.


Hopefully, these ten signs will provide better awareness if this is an area you struggle with.

Once we know, we can grow.

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